I believe in science, which may or may not make me
a humanist, I’m really not sure. I suppose the closest I’ve ever been to
unravelling the mysteries of “spirituality” was many years ago when I was
convinced I could become Rastafarian. As you do. For a while I studied what
that actually meant, the general “ethos” behind it, and even contemplated
visiting Ethiopia in search of further inspiration and/or wisdom. It turned out
to be a rather temporary condition. Somewhere along the way the plan was thwarted
and binned – probably because I was white, ginger, broke, and way too wasted to
make any of it a reality.
But it turns out I’m also a hypocrite because like the
vast majority of other heathens in the western world I also celebrate
Christmas. I’m not sure how that comes about. Probably just habit, and because
it comes with the bonus of a few days of holiday. The chance to spend quality
time with the family while they drool over the wonders of materialism, and I
lose myself in the delights of long since forgotten about black and white
movies on television. There’s also, weather permitting, the distinct
possibility of some driveway cricket. But the Christmas break – and by
extension, an acknowledgement of Christianity – is the catalyst for all of
that. It seems a very odd thing for a non-believer to become a temporary
believer when it suits, but there it is.
I often confront a similar dilemma, or condition,
when it comes to listening to roots reggae music – so much of it deals with
faith and all matters spiritual. Yet I actually love all of that stuff about
praising Jah, connecting with the “most high”, and the endless number of
biblical references. I’m not quite sure why I enjoy those songs of praise in a
musical form, but they resonate, and I connect with them in ways I seldom do
with other forms of musical expression … but ask me to sing a hymn? Hmmm.
A few years ago, a friend suggested that "everything happens for a reason" and to
be honest I was fairly dismissive of the notion. It reeked of that mysterious “higher
power” and I just couldn't grasp the concept. But I totally get it now. It
wasn't about not having any control over events or being subjected to some kind
of pre-determined destiny, it was about using the experience life was throwing
at me in order to understand myself better. Using events to shape personal
growth.
And this year, more than ever, I’ve continually been
given cause to think a little bit more about that higher power. About what it
all means, this thing called life. About mortality. And about those pesky issues
such as personal morals. About truth, and dare I get to the point (please do –
Ed), about that staple of all faith, that thing called forgiveness. It’s
something I've been struggling with - forgiving others for perceived (and real)
injustices, while also seeking forgiveness from others. Most importantly, after
much soul searching, I came to realise that I couldn’t move on or embrace any
of the “personal growth” referred to above, unless I learned to forgive myself
and others … even if that meant doing it in my own non-religious
arse-about-face kind of way.
So anyway, to stop short of
turning my final pre-Christmas post of 2014 into some sort of sermon with
loads of new age gobbledegook, and
to conclude the Festive Dozen countdown, here’s the Madrid-based Bass Culture Players
with the everythingsgonegreen tune of the year – not just for its lyrical
significance and personal relevance, but because Payoh Soul Rebel’s Marley-esque
vocal blew me away each and every time I heard it … Merry Christmas
everythingsgonegreen reader, enjoy the festive break, I’ve just been told it’s
my turn to bat ...